How Strength Training Changed My Body (and My Relationship with Fitness)

For years, I danced around the edges of fitness. I dabbled in yoga, tried the occasional cardio class, and followed trending home workouts on social media. But nothing ever really stuck. I was always chasing an ideal, a body shape I thought would make me feel more confident, more lovable, more "fit." But underneath that surface-level goal was a complicated relationship with exercise—one based more on punishment and obligation than love and empowerment.

That all changed when I discovered strength training.

Breaking Up with the "Burn Calories" Mindset

Before strength training, my workouts were entirely focused on how many calories I could burn. I associated movement with shrinking myself. I'd hop on the treadmill, watch the numbers tick, and feel like that dictated whether my workout was successful. Fitness became transactional.

But something inside me craved more—more connection, more depth, more purpose. I didn’t just want to lose something. I wanted to gain. And that shift in mindset opened the door to something completely new.

It started humbly—just a pair of 5-pound dumbbells in my living room. I followed a 20-minute beginner strength workout online, expecting to feel awkward and maybe a little bored. Instead, I felt grounded. Focused. Present. I wasn’t chasing a calorie number or gasping for air. I was moving with intention. Feeling my muscles engage. Learning how to brace my core, how to hinge my hips. It was like meeting my body for the first time, not for what it looked like, but for what it could do.

From "Toned Arms" to Inner Strength

At first, sure—I still had aesthetic goals. I wanted stronger arms, better posture, a lifted booty. And strength training did change my body. I started to feel more sculpted. My clothes fit differently. I saw definition I’d never seen before.

But over time, those changes felt like a bonus. The real transformation was internal. Strength training gave me structure. A reason to show up for myself. A way to track progress that had nothing to do with weight or measurements.

When I hit a personal best on deadlifts, I felt invincible. When I finally did push-ups on my toes, I felt unstoppable. Every rep became a reminder: I am capable. I am powerful.

Healing My Relationship with Fitness

As a wellness and exercise coach, I now see strength training as a gateway. It’s not just a tool for physical change—it’s an invitation to heal. To rewrite the narrative so many of us carry: that fitness is something we "have to do" to be worthy, attractive, or disciplined.

Strength training taught me that movement can be nourishing, not punishing. It showed me the joy of consistency—not obsession. I learned to rest without guilt. To listen to my body. To appreciate the process, not just the outcome.

What Strength Training Looks Like Now

These days, my workouts are a mix of dumbbells, resistance bands, and bodyweight movements. I keep it simple: three to four full-body sessions a week. I blend in Pilates-inspired flows for core strength and mobility. I walk almost daily—often with my dogs—as a way to reset and reconnect with nature.

I don’t chase extremes. I don’t train to exhaustion. I train to feel good.

Some weeks, I’m strong and focused. Other weeks, I’m tired and gentle with myself. But I always come back to it—not out of guilt, but out of love.

My Advice to Anyone Starting Out

If you’re at the very beginning of your fitness journey — whether you’re dusting off your sneakers after a long break or stepping into movement for the first time — I want you to know this: you don’t need to have it all figured out. You don’t need the perfect plan, the perfect body, or the perfect motivation. You just need a starting point and a little bit of patience with yourself.

As a professional wellness and movement coach, I’ve worked with all kinds of people — from complete beginners to seasoned athletes who’ve lost their spark. And time and time again, what makes the biggest difference is never perfection. It’s consistency, self-compassion, and finding a routine that feels like a form of care rather than punishment.

Let me say this plainly: You don’t need to hustle your way into strength. You get to arrive there with softness, curiosity, and respect for your body — just as it is, right now.

When I first started strength training, I wasn’t trying to sculpt my body into some impossible standard. I just wanted to feel strong. Capable. Energized in my everyday life. And the beautiful thing is, strength training gave me all of that — and so much more.

It taught me that I was allowed to take up space. That I was allowed to show up for myself, even on the days when I didn’t feel particularly “motivated.” It helped me understand that strength isn’t just about muscle — it’s about the mindset you bring to your workouts and your life.

So if I could give you a few pieces of advice as you step into this new chapter, it would be these:

Start with the intention of care, not control.
Too often, we approach fitness from a place of fixing or changing ourselves. But what if this time, you chose to move because you deserve care? Because your body works so hard for you, and movement is your way of saying thank you?

Keep it embarrassingly simple.
You don’t need to train five days a week or have a complex split. You can start with two or three short strength sessions a week — even 20 minutes is powerful. Pair it with daily movement like walking or stretching. Let it build naturally. Let yourself grow with it.

Track progress beyond the scale.
How do you feel after a workout? Are your energy levels better? Are you sleeping deeper? Is your mood lifting? These are the real signs of progress. Your body will change, yes — but the biggest shift will be in how you feel in your body.

Find your version of fun.
If lifting heavy weights in a gym feels intimidating, start with bodyweight movements at home. If you love music, make a playlist that gets you in the mood to move. If you’re a soft girl at heart (hi, me too 🫶), light a candle, roll out your mat, and turn strength into a ritual, not a chore.

Rest is not the opposite of progress — it’s part of it.
You’re not being lazy by resting. You’re being wise. Your body builds strength in rest. Honor your energy cycles. Know when to push and when to soften. Learn to listen.

Celebrate every little win.
Did you show up on a day you didn’t feel like it? Did you increase your weight even just a little? Did you feel proud of your form today? Celebrate those moments. Stack them like little love notes to your future self.

Most importantly: you’re allowed to do this in your own way.
You don’t need to perform fitness for anyone else. You’re allowed to go slow, to take detours, to have off weeks and come back stronger. You’re allowed to make your fitness journey beautiful, soft, empowering, and yours.

SO LISTEN!

Strength training didn’t just change my body—it gave me a new way to live in my body. It taught me to show up, not to fix myself, but to know myself. It reminded me that strength isn’t just physical—it’s emotional, mental, and deeply personal.

And that, more than anything, is why I’ll keep showing up, one rep at a time.

Whether you're a seasoned lifter or just beginning your journey, I hope my story reminds you that fitness isn’t about perfection. It’s about connection. It's about coming home to yourself. 💫